No Goals? No problem. Here's another way to think about growth.

It's exactly mid-Jan as I write this. Are your goals all set?

In case they're not, or you're not clear about what's next or are feeling stuck or maybe even lost, I wanted to offer another perspective. And I want you to know that you're not alone.

Normally by this time I've set up my New Year, New You workshop. Normally I've created a workbook ready with reflective questions and exercises. Normally I've considered what words I want to serve as my anthem.

But I'm not feeling normal. And none of that appeals to me.  

A new way of working (and being) is calling and I've been hanging out to understand what that is. I've been taking it s l o w.

I've been listening.

And it's freakishly uncomfortable.

Since my book, The Work Happiness Method, launched as an instant bestseller, folks have been asking me "what's next?"

And I keep saying the same thing, "I'm not quite sure."

It's not an exciting answer. It's not the answer other people want to hear. It's certainly not the answer I want to give, either. But it's the truth.

Of course I'm continuing to keynote and coach. So holla if you want to do something together!

But I'm not throwing myself into anything new just because I think I should.

And just because it's the new year, it doesn't mean you have to do anything new either (unless you want to).

I'm not anti-goals, anti-resolutions, or anti-planning. Those are important. And normally, I love the stillness that comes around new years time to do just that.

But sometimes it's also important to give space for something to emerge in a creative, non-linear, unplanned kinda way.

If you're feeling unclear, stuck, lost or just unmotivated...what if you're not stuck, lost, or unmotivated?

What if you're just in transformation?

Consider the caterpillar (I know it's an overused metaphor but it's perfect so stay with me).
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Even before it enters metamorphosis it goes through several stages of growth, shedding its skin all while remaining a caterpillar. Perhaps you've been growing, too. And you expect the growth to look like it has before. But now it's not.

This next level doesn't look like the others.  

What got the caterpillar here won't get it there (thanks, Marshall Goldsmith). There's no more room for it to expand and stay in its body. It forms a chrysalis structure - which looks like a dead leaf barely hanging onto a branch. It seems as if nothing is happening and nobody is home.

But meanwhile there's a magic stew of transformation taking place.

We're conditioned to always be doing, planning, looking ahead. But what if what's needed for you (or me, maybe I'm just writing this for me... am I?), is to surrender to the process. What if you're in your chrysalis?

What would it look like and feel like to give yourself a break from complaining about things, criticizing yourself for not being where you want to be, and just allow the waves of change to happen?

What if you're being held and it's all happening as it should?

For about a month I grew so tired of feeling discombobulated and disoriented that I felt imposter syndrome creep in. I'd look in the mirror and not recognize myself. Am I aging? Is it my haircut? Is it hormones? Have I lost it?

But now I'm seeing this stage for what it is, I'm shedding, I'm shifting, I'm transforming.

I have faith in the outcome of which I know not. And I have faith in yours too.

If you find yourself in the in-between, honor it. If you can't quite locate yourself, it may be because you're not yourself, you're evolving. This in-between is preparing you. Perhaps it's about gathering information, dismantling patterns, or waiting for the right guidance.

Here's what's helping me while I'm in this stage:
1. Nature - both because it calms my nervous system and also because it inspires awe. I go for walks.
2. Friends and family - being with those who see me and support me. Love alchemizes fear.
3. Curiosity dates - small moments where I afford myself the time to journal, dream, draw, and kindle whatever wonder I have. This connects with possibility and spark - even if it's three minutes.
4. Somatic work - discovering more and more what it means to stay in my body and be deeply present. I'm healing old stuff.

You'll have your own way through this. It can look ugly and frustrating at times while you're in it, but your gorgeous wings are on their way.